ME, that's who.
It's true. With absolutely no help from anyone who knows anything about hackers (thanks to the horrible tech support staff provided by our host services), I found the offensive htm file and got rid of it.
(I hope that's all I needed to do.)
And now our homepage is working just fine.
To celebrate, here's a code you can use to get 40% off your next order: GENIUSme
Also, you can send me congratulatory wishes for being such a tremendous genius in the form of chocolate and a nap.
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Thanks for visiting. You can only leave a comment if you're going to tell us how awesome we are. Or how much you love our art. We can't accept negative comments, because unfortunately we don't have enough people to staff a complaint department.